What's Next?

Five days ago marked exactly one year until Match Day.

Which, has pretty much been on our minds since the first year of medical school.

And definitely since Jason decided on plastics and our course was set to that trajectory.

What is Match Day?

Match Day is the day when all the 4th year medical students find out where they will be doing their residency training for the next 3-7 years. 

In Jason's case, 

it will be 6.

He will spend this fall interviewing at plastic surgery programs.

Once interviews are completed,

he will rank his programs according to his preference and submit his rank list to an online system.

All the programs in the country will do the same.

They will rank their applicants to this same online system,

and a computer algorithm will "match" applicant to program.

You can watch a video on how this all works here.

Match Day is always on a Friday.

Usually the 2nd or 3rd Friday of March.

The Monday before Match Day,

students receive an email that says whether or not they matched.

But the email does not tell them where they matched.

That's what you find out on Friday.

So if Jason interviews at 15 programs,

he will rank those 15 programs,

#1: First choice

#2: Second choice

and so on...

(and they will rank him,

hopefully!).

So, on Match Day,

we could end up at any one of those places on his list.

Without completing residency,

you can't practice medicine.

So matching is kind of a big deal.

In fact, 

I think most would agree it's a bigger deal than graduation.

Jason's school has a big ceremony every year,

and a big countdown to 9 a.m.

(the whole country has to open their results at the same time)

I've been watching Match Day videos on YouTube since Jason's first year,

and I would always get so emotional thinking of what our experience will be like.

And it's crazy that it's our turn next. 

It will be quite a year.

So much happens in 4th year.

This summer, Jason will do 3 plastic surgery rotations at different programs around the country.

Those he hopes to match to.

We only have one of those rotations secured,

and it's in Memphis,

at the University of Tennessee.

He applied for a rotation at the Mayo Clinic in Scottsdale,

and at University of Texas Southwestern in Dallas.

We are still waiting to hear back from those places.

Each of those rotations is 4 weeks.

When those are over,

it will basically be time to apply to residency programs.

That happens in Sept/Oct.

The hope is that he'll get interviews,

and plastic surgery does the bulk of their interviews in December and January.

Once interviews are over,

then it's time to submit a rank list.

And then we wait.

It all feels very stressful,

and frankly,

I have anxiety daily.

It has been incredibly difficult to have faith in God's plan for us.

I love my life here.

I love my house,

my neighborhood,

my ward.

I love my kids' school.

I love their friends.

And their friends' moms. 

I love Navy's and Lily's dance studio,

I love Navy's music teacher.

I love Camden's group of 'sports friends',

who play on the same team every season.

I love Lily's speech therapist. 

It is home.

It will always be.

And even if Jason does get an interview at Mayo,

and even if he gets accepted there,

we will still move to be closer to the hospital. 

And while Phoenix is infinitely closer to family than say,

New York,

it still feels like a world away,

and I'm already mourning the loss of our life here.

I cry about it a lot.

And because we won't know where we will end up for another year,

I feel so stuck in my emotions.

I want to enjoy our year of 'lasts' here,

and I'm trying,

I'm really trying.

Trying to just be still,

and soak up all the memories these next 14 months have for us.

But I also feel the urge to distance myself from the life,

and people,

and surroundings that I love so much,

so maybe come May 2020,

it won't break my heart so much to say goodbye.

I have this mental image of Jason dragging me out of our empty house by my feet,

as I leave nail marks in the walls.

And I can't look forward to our new home,

can't get excited about what our new life has to offer,

because we don't know where that is yet.

If there was ever a time of my life when I felt in limbo,

this is it.

I focused my anxiety on researching anything and everything I could get my hands on regarding  plastic surgery programs,

suburbs of major cities,

homes for sale in said suburbs

moving costs,

school districts,

commute time,

etc etc etc.

And when I realized that it was only making my nerves more on edge,

to the point where I wasn't sleeping,

and feeling physically ill some nights,

I found a new project to focus my free time on.

So far it's working.

If you wanted to keep us in your prayers,

as we face a daunting year of decisions,

and uncertainty,

I would so appreciate it.